I stopped hiding & it changed everything
“The sooner you step up into the greater most authentic version of You, the sooner your fears will dissipate, the sooner your concerns will begin to fade, the sooner life will bend towards you. The more you will flow with life.”
― Rebecca Campbell, Light Is the New Black*
(*I earn a small commission of you buy this book through this link, with no extra cost to you)
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I really want to write about the core essence of what I stand for and what The Wishing Well stands for.
Two words, ‘not hiding’.
I believe in it stronger than ever now because I can see the changes it has brought to my life. And it’s just not me observing these changes, it’s other people telling me and pointing out things that I haven’t even noticed.
But it all starts with you. It all starts with being who you really are.
Why is it important to show your true self?
These are some of the recent benefits and successes, both personal and professional that I have noticed ever since I started expressing myself freely.
My art practice
I create art that is true. Because I stopped being afraid and stopped caring about people. Now when I paint or draw, there’s nothing holding me back. There is no fear of people judging me because I know the right people who understand my art will appreciate it. Which brings me to the next point.
My support system
Ever since I became of myself I have been attracting people, personally and professionally who understand who I truly am. And repelling people who don’t value me (probably never valued me and this gave them a push).
When you create true things, the right people will be in awe of you. They will be in awe of the things you create. And those are the people you need to focus on.
Professionally, I have been attracting a lot of opportunities that I never thought I could before!
My motivation and social life
Ever since I started dressing up how I truly wanted to, without the fear of judgment, I feel a lot more confident and I feel more motivated to socialize and go meet people. This has helped my confidence in professional settings too as an entrepreneur.
These are only the few most recent things.
How did I start expressing myself?
This process took me years. This is actually what I coach people through when they work with me.
I have my own method ‘be fearless effect’ which I help my clients through inside my 90-day signature program. You can visit the link and apply if you need my help.
It can be a scary process so I would advice to have a friend to keep supporting you or work with a life coach. It would be very very overwhelming to do it on your own and you might quit. I did too several times.
1. Interact with people with similar interests
First thing I did was to meet people. I started with photowalks because I didn’t have to talk to anybody and just have a good time.
Then I started going to networking events. It wasn’t always good. I met weird people but I also met good people. I also realized the kind of events that weren’t good for me and the kind of events that I should go to.
I remember I felt really good when I went to this artist meet-up. There was another wellness based meet-up. But this other time I went to this entrepreneur, it didn’t feel good to me. There were a lot of people. There was barely any communicating and a lot of more showing off.
There are events and meetups happening online all the time, even for free. You can join something you like. You can find them on Eventbrite or Facebook events or meetups.
2. Personal writing for self-discovery
Journaling to figure out who you are. Even the dark parts, weird parts and your desires. Expressive arts really helps with this process too because for some people it’s easier to draw then to write. That is why I use that with my clients. It’s like a no judgment space.
These are some self-discovery prompts you can use to write or draw. I would really recommend to actually sit down and do it on paper and do it every day or every other day.
- When did it feel good in my life? Like I was present in this world? What activities I used to do? What places I used to go?
- What is something that really calls out to me right now? Or things that my friends mention to me that I ignore?
In my list I wrote music, singing and dance. These were hobbies but they really made me feel good and gave me energy. Took to me a past moment when I felt really really happy without pretending to be happy.
Something that called out to me was doing traditional art that I ignored for so long. Also the beach, which is something difficult to do and I’m still working on it because I live very far way from the beach.
3. Interact with people one on one
Connecting with people online on DMs, meeting old friends or just dating. Because when you meet someone new, it’s a clean slate and it’s chance for you to either keep telling them the story that you have been telling them. Or you can be honest. You can tell them sometime new about you and just notice how it feels to you to be honest about your self. And then take it slowly from there.
When I reconnected with old friends I remembered some things about me that I had forgotten that I really liked. Or I some parts I have really changed and evolved and I decided I am not going back there again.
4. Start checking things off your list
Get something done, push yourself a bit everyday or every week. Start with something that feels comparatively easier.
I started my art diary and I only shared my true sketches with the world when I felt comfortable.
I started listening to the music I used to listen years before and also started opening myself to new kinds of music, that people would suggest to me. I started singing by myself. Which was huge because I stopped singing completely. Before I would actually sing on stage at school.
And then I pushed and push and then I dyed my hair. I got a nose piercing. Both of those times my sister went with me because she wanted that done too. So I had that support.
Anyway, I pushed and pushed. And now here I am.
Final thoughts on being your true self
I’m still pushing myself. I haven’t stopped. Every day is a chance for you to grow a little bit more and follow your heart. There are still things from my list that I haven’t and the list just keeps growing. The more I do things I really want to do and the more say things I really want to say, the more clarity I get into the person I truly am and the more confident and fearless I become everyday to be my true self.
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